How do you know when you’ve had enough? The feeling of ‘enough’ is usually tied into and associated with something negative or scarce. We want that other slice of cake but we know deep down that we’ve had enough. We are trying for the umpteenth time in our relationship but we know that we can no longer tolerate another day with our spouse. We try, (we really do), to enjoy where we work but we are usually full of anger and regret at the end of each day.
But enough can also be viewed in the context of abundance. There are so many opportunities available that we are giddy with choices and unable to make one for ourselves. Knowledge is out there and we feel energized just knowing that we have access to all this information but at the end of our search we feel overwhelmed and uncertain that we’ve found the best solution because there is so much more that we haven’t yet found. We have so much and feel that we must give and yet sometimes we aren’t sure whether we’ve in fact given enough. We take on more and more onto our plate because after all we are blessed with much and so we just feel as if we can do more and more and be more and more to others.
Where in your business or life can you take a step back and trust in your own ‘enough’?
Feelings of disconnectedness with ourselves are usually definite indicators that we’ve reached our ‘enough’ threshold yet we ignore the signs.
Once we begin counting the cost of our giving – that’s time for us to stop and think about our motives; after all giving is supposed to be a joyful experience. If it morphs into pressured ‘shoulds’ we need to disengage – reflect – and rethink our WHYs.
If we overeat we know we will have a physical reaction – feeling stuffed and perhaps unable to do anything for the next couple of hours. But the damage is far worse than the physical response. We berate ourselves for the act and go into self hatred mode which only serves to undermine our self confidence and erode the little love and compassion that we have for ourselves.
If we keep taking on more and more hoping that someone out there will eventually notice our worth we’re feeding a monster that could never be sated. The truth is the more you take on, the more you will be given without ever getting your desire for public praise or recognition satisfied.
Have you been nodding your head, seeing yourself in the sentences and wondering what you could do? It’s quite simple really: Stop tolerating.
Take 20 seconds right now (I mean it) – to think and write down between one to three situations where you know you’ve reached your ‘enough’ point and need some time to recharge and regroup. Stop tolerating anything that makes you feel less than, and not deserving of.
Shawn Driscoll, a sought-after coach and business consultant to high-achieving entrepreneurs globally, tell her clients often – “Stop tolerating LESS THAN – Less than you expect. Less than you deserve. Less than you are paid for right now. Less than you need. Make a DECISION to put an end to it today. Right now. Be DONE tolerating what drains you, derails you, frustrates you, and holds you back. Maybe it’s something you’re tolerating from someone else. Maybe it’s something you’re tolerating within yourself. Whatever it is, be DONE with it.”
There’s a part of us that wants to play it safe. We don’t want to offend anyone, step on any toes, fall out of favor, or worse be ostracized. This seems worse for us in our heads than it ever plays out in reality. Know that whenever we make changes people around us are going to kick a fuss. They are going to make us feel bad because we are no longer doing that which they are comfortable with. You’ve been doing whatever you’ve been doing for a very long time so expect some resistance from others.
Now is the time to surrender. Feel the breeze in your own life. Think about the invisible medium– that you sometimes walk through every day – without resistance. This is your lesson: no resistance. Resist nothing. Be with every feeling, every emotion, and every thought.
Become aware of your own ‘enough’ and watch your life shift.