Has anyone ever asked you that question? I mean really? Would it be okay if life got easier? It sounds preposterous doesn’t it? Life is supposed to be a struggle. If anything comes too easily we look at it sideways with much suspicion. What’s the catch? Where’s the hidden camera? I’m being punked right now aren’t I?
“[Our] relentless pursuit of success is a lot like trying to hunt a wild animal”, says Marketing Strategist – Gary Korisko. “To pull it off, you have to know when to be aggressive – and when to be stealthy. Your prey, success, is smart and elusive. It’s skilled in dodging people like you and me whose goal is to catch it, tame it, and keep it as a pet.
Eventually, if you have a smart strategy – and a ton of intestinal fortitude – the planets will align and you might just catch success by the tail.”
Isn’t that a better description of how we’re living our lives right now? In pursuit of success, chasing it, working long hours to achieve it…doing WHATEVER IT TAKES to get it? And we’ve become quite an impatient bunch too! A lot of the stress we feel is because we’re not sure if we’re at the beginning middle or end of our journey to success. We’ve been at it long enough and we’d like to know how it’s going to turn out. We’re INCREDIBLY UNCOMFORTABLE with DISCOMFORT and UNCERTAINTY. We want everything NOW: Answers, success, resolution. We push to make things happen now. Later isn’t an option.
“But even after it’s caught” Gary explains, “success retains it feral instincts. It plays possum. It temporarily bends to your will, letting you think you’ve decoded all its secrets. Over time, you begin to believe that you’ve mastered it – which is exactly what it wants you to think. Your ego kicks in, and you begin to believe you have all the answers. You begin to believe that you’ve discovered the formula. The secrets of success are now yours. And they belong to you forever. Don’t they? Precisely at the moment you become distracted by your own glow, success springs back to life – bites you in the butt and escapes back into the wild.
“Many times we lose sight of our goals and dreams. Or we spend years analyzing why things didn’t turn out as planned or why our vision seems obscured. Some of us discover that success isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. We may have accomplished plenty, but we’re too exhausted or distracted to enjoy our lives.” No one is immune explains Dr. Maria Nemeth who has worked for more than 25 years with thousands of people who have had similar experiences – leaders, teachers, ministers, entrepreneurs, physicians, coaches, therapists, students, moms, dads, and friends. Every one of them wanted to know: What is the question to which my life is the answer?”
Dr. Nemeth speaks to audiences worldwide on how to bring clarity, focus, ease, and grace to life. The first question posed to audiences is usually: “Would it be all right if life got easier?” She says: “I mean really, would you be willing to explore living your life with clarity, focus, ease and grace?” This is what she means…
The greatest difficulty ALWAYS comes right before the birth of a dream. There are tons of obstacles and challenges here and the learning curve is as steep as it gets. The idea of “Trouble at the Border”, a metaphor used by Dr. Nemeth, describes the difficulties that arise when we are at a challenging place in bringing our vision to life. Whether it’s the bridge between our promises and the financial miracles we’d like to experience; or the fears we have about the relationships we long for, there is a border. A border might be a boundary preventing intimacy in a relationship that one is afraid to cross. A border might begin with a sudden diagnosis of cancer in a loved one.
Creativity is the gift of being human and the challenge arises at the Border where “the fun and inspiration of the original idea encounters the energy requirement of physical reality.” -Which is why Dr. Nemeth invites us to explore living with clarity, focus ease and grace….
*Clarity – We need to be clear about what’s really important to us, what resonates with us. You’d be surprised how many people (and I find women in particular), are stumped when asked “what do you want?” I’m not talking about immediate needs around shelter, food, clothing etc. But what do you want to do with your life? Many have no clue! Dr Nemeth underscores that in order to have a luminous life we must engage in a GAME WORTH PLAYING with GOALS WORTH PLAYING for! When we do what we ENJOY THE GAME, have goals for the game that are meaningful to us, and clarity about how we want to live our lives.
*Focus – Dr. Nemeth describes doing a ‘life’s intentions’ inventory’ to understand what to focus on. Focusing your attention will take your mind off of the worries and distractions in your life and also keep you engaged in what you find interesting and what you are truly intended to be doing with your life
*Grace – Put very simply ‘the way to grace is through gratitude.’
When you are clear about what you REALLY want, when you are focused on where you’re going and living intentionally, when you are grateful for EVERYTHING then you can begin living your life with more ease. One of the key elements to bringing ease into our lives is to bring our everyday actions into ALIGNMENT with what is important to us.
Bottom line: our lives can get easier but if we are NOT ALIGNED our lives will seem difficult as we try to engage with activities that we do not find interesting or that are in conflict with our life’s intentions.
*Clarity, Focus, Ease and Grace – Life Lessons from Dr. Maria Nehemeth, Notes from KIM BOX , an inspirational leader, writer and speaker who has 29 years of experience in the high-tech industry leading and transforming large-scale organizations.