When exactly will you feel successful?

I, like many others, have been watching the Olympic games and with that, the advertisements that support me being able to view the games from the comfort of my home.

There are advertisements for new cars, investment propositions and guidance on how to transact business online with ease.

This got me thinking about goals.

There is so much about what’s available and what are some of the requirements needed BEFORE we get those things (down payments, credit approvals) etc. But we’re left to figure out the “how” and that’s when setting goals can become depressing.

We’ve been involved in goal setting from our childhoods to present day. First it was about successfully completing an exam to transition from primary to secondary school. Then the exams to transition from there into the world of work or to pursue a tertiary education. After that it was all about getting a good job and being paid well so that we could finance our new home, cars and of course yearly vacations.

Does it ever end?

Is it that you’ll wake up one day and say, “I’ve arrived!”? When is it that you will actually feel successful? When will you reach that ultimate goal you keep working towards?

Justin Kruger, CEO and Founder of Project Helping asks – What if goal setting is a lose-lose proposition?

Think about any goal you’ve set. When you reached that goal, did it change your life? Did you become happier for having reached it? Inevitably, we set goals with the idea that when we achieve that goal, when we get that thing, or accomplish that goal we will make it and finally be happy. However, one of two things typically happens.

  1. We either reach our goal, only to find that nothing has changed and so we feel the need to set yet another goal.
  2. Or, we don’t reach our goal at all and instead gain the inevitable feeling of failure and loss.

In either case, what was truly accomplished?

Justin had been living with a mental health challenge, but no one close to him knew that he was struggling.

I had a great job. I was successful. It seemed like I had everything – and truly I did. But privately, I was struggling.

When he started Project Helping, he didn’t do it with the goal to grow it to a certain size. He didn’t do it to raise “$X” or help “X” number of people.

His intention was to provide people with the same experience – the same “ah-ha” moment he gained, and to feel what he did the first time he volunteered. If he could do just that – it would be incredible.

Retirement or making a certain amount of money was never at the forefront of my mind. A few simple guiding principals – goals per se – help me make decisions. These principles give me a tremendous amount of purpose and drive in my life:

  1. Be a great Dad. I have little ones and they are amazing. Exhausting, but amazing. I don’t have a preconceived notion of what my kids should accomplish or be, I want them to be happy, kind, and work hard. That’s it. Everything I do it to help show them how to find their passion in life and live in that passion. Nothing more.
  2. Be a great husband. My wife is the best person I know. I don’t have a goal of being married for “X” number of years. At this point, I don’t have any concept to what a “good” marriage or what a “bad” marriage is. If I do everything I can, every day to be the best husband I can be, the rest will work itself out.
  3. I want to continue to help as many people as we can at Project Helping. Every decision that I and we make is with that mission in mind. How can we help more people and make sure we are around for a long time to deliver our innovative solution to anyone and everyone who needs our help?

Those are my goals. I love working towards them a little more every day. I will never “reach” those goals, but I will also never NOT reach those goals (yes, that’s a double negative). That’s the beauty of it. I have strong guideposts that I am adamant about working towards and they are all I need to make every decision I will need to make in my life.

Think about your goals.

Think about how you are setting them and why you are setting them.

What is it that you want?

I feel that when we are able to reframe our goals, we get to enjoy the process and like I also say, if you focus on the process, the results happen.

I’d love to talk to you more about what’s happening in your life and which goals seem elusive to you. If you want to chat, get in touch by clicking here. Would love to hear from you!

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